Content warning: This post contains discussions of eating disorders, both in the book and briefly from my own experience. If you are in recovery or sensitive to this topic, please proceed with care. Your mental health comes first.

I’m Glad My Mom Died is an arresting and brutal memoir that traces McCurdy’s rise to stardom under the shadow of an abusive mother and a consuming eating disorder. There were many other abusive people and maladaptive coping mechanisms but I just want to talk about her mother and her eating disorder because they were the centre of the story for me.

McCurdy’s disordered eating starts early in the memoir, introduced under the disguise of calorie restriction, something her mom teaches her as part of maintaining a certain image. But it is not until after her mother’s death that it spirals into full-blown bulimia. That progression took over the entire story for me. It brought me back to my own university years in Scotland, when I struggled with similar patterns. I did not tell anyone because I was afraid that people would dismiss my pain and insist that I should be thankful just to be studying abroad.

That kind of self-silencing fed the cycle: the bingeing, the purging, the pain. Eventually, it hurt too much, and I stopped purging but kept binge eating and avoiding solids altogether. I was lucky to have met a partner whose love was greater than my insecurity. While this is all behind me now, memories still resurface from time to time and my relationship with food remains complicated. Most of it consisting feelings of guilt and shame. McCurdy’s story mirrored mine in ways I did not expect and could not ignore.

And McCurdy’s portrayal of her mom. It made me understand better why people do not simply just walk away from abuse, even when it seems like the most obvious solution. Though the abuse is undeniably damaging, she never fully demonizes her. This complexity demonstrated the deep and often painful bond between mother and daughter. How it can be both toxic and unbreakable.

Would I recommend I’m Glad My Mom Died? Yes, I would. Despite having finished it on my eReader, I intend to buy myself a physical copy. It is one of those books you want to hold in your hands and highlight all the sentences with each page that resonates while lying grief-stricken on the floor. I do not think I will be forgetting about this book anytime soon.